Faith in myself 

Faith is a passionate intuition – William Wordsworth 

While I have been away on this trip, I have been writing Morning Pages most days. Getting all of my thoughts out onto paper. I have also happily and joyfully discovered my artistic creativity and ability with the guidance of my travelling companion Tannis Ross –

I realised this morning , as I woke and rushed right back to the art table in my PJ’s, that I have gifted myself the space, time and opportunity to explore  myself and 




 my creativity and as a result have released a feeling of ‘I can’t’ and replaced it with a passionate knowing that’ I can’. The act of art journalling is bringing me so much joy.

This realisation brings me so much faith in myself , and I can’t wait to see where this knowing takes me next in my life when I get home. 

For today , more lake time and then tonight on to a dance party in a kitchen in North Vancouver and a gondola ride in Whistler. 

Faith in myself feels good. 
‘Travel allows me to find the open bright future ‘ 


What else am I not doing because I believe I can’t ? & Feeling Unlimited.


 During my stay in Winnipeg I was invited to attend a Paint Nite event where Tannis is the resident artist. 

When I saw the description of the event and the painting I would be creating I immediately thought it would be a fun evening , and that there would be no way on earth that I would be able to produce anything like that one . I have admired the work of others, I enjoy colouring in and find it relaxing, I create vision pages all the time , but paint ??? Me?? Nah, I’d avoid it like the plague.

Why ?? Is it something I can get wrong ? Would someone think ‘ who does she think she is ?’  What old stories am I listening to ? Who told me I couldn’t paint ? 

At age 12 in my first year of high school I achieved First Prize for Art. I guess I must have painted then. My main memory of that year is making a collage of a bonfire with a Guy Fawkes on top , using twigs and crepe paper , ribbons , wool and part of an old sack for the guy.  I really enjoyed the creating and I wonder when I stopped feeling I could create and be creative ..,I didn’t ever get another art prize and maybe that discouraged me. 
What else am I not doing ? what else are you not doing ? How do we limit ourselves because we think we can’t. 
I decided yesterday to choose another guiding word in addition to Epic, to take me through the remainder of 2015. 

I chose Unlimited – I will no longer limit myself. 
Today I passed this shop in Canmore, Alberta. It was called Unlimited. If confirmation was needed, I got it. I’m listening . Thank you . 



This bed, this bath , that view.

Intuitive energy healer Robin Hallett wisely advocates starting your day ‘ as if ‘ you were on vacation , and it is a suggestion I try to adhere to when I am at home. Not always as easy as it sounds but when I do manage to ease into the day instead of rushing into it, everything seems to unravel more smoothly. 
As of arrival here at Solara resort last night , I utterly feel as if I truly Am on vacation , and am absorbing the feelings of this divine setting and living space to take home with me , and to refer myself back to at busier and more stressful times

I want to remember this bed, and the sun on my face  through the open balcony door this morning .  I feel as if I slept on a cloud. 
   I want to remember this bath where I sank into and stayed a while at midnight last night  

And I want to remember this sunset last night  

And I won’t forget  

  dinner with friends I hadn’t seen for 30 years , since we met aged 24 travelling around Australia. 

And just for the record , not everything is perfectly rosy , as I have 5 mosquito bites on one ankle and 2 more bites where the sun don’t shine !! 

Gazing at the prairies & wherever I travel my home is right here in my heart 



 Unfamiliar horizons , fields of yellow and green,  wide big skies full of dark rolling rain clouds. Red barns, unexpected churches in the middle of a field , tractors, vintage tractor gatherings  and vast empty flatness , with no hills yet in the distance upon which to rest my eyes. 

Travelling next to the Canadian Pacific railroad. Very gradually overtaking the longest goods train I have ever ever seen.

Miles and miles of very straight road ahead 

I am thinking about how I an travelling through Canada and travelling through my days and travelling through my life. 
The spacious horizons and skies ,the fact that someone else is driving affords me the opportunity to journey inwards as well as across and through the landscape . 

And a reminder that wherever I travel , North South East or West, my home is right here in my heart . 

Sailing my ship , and expanding my global heart

Tall ship KAJAMA ~ Toronto Harbour front ~ dusk 13/07/15F

‘A ship in harbour is safe ; but that is not what ships are built for’ – I don’t think it is what I was built for either. At the age of 56 I still have the same urge to indulge my wanderlust I did at the age of 16, when I first joined a cruise on the SS Uganda with sea cadets, and knew that the sea, and a longing for the sea , would play a big part in my life.  ( note to self to write about this)

While sitting on the deck at Liz’s house in Littleton, MA on my last day with her last week, I felt a sudden breeze rise and  blow past me and it ruffled the folds of the canvas umbrella at the table where I sat. The sound of the canvas flapping and whipping in the wind reminded me instantly of the sound of the sails of a yacht, and I thought of how I am also adjusting and setting my own sails to determine my direction and the way I will go, and how I check in with myself and the wind and adjust my sails accordingly, again and again and again.

As I prepared to leave Toronto yesterday, amid the love and connection and conversations with the women I met there, I was mindful of the poem The Ship by Bishop Brent. It is actually about dying, and was a part of my father’s funeral service. Four years ago, as I  was about to be made redundant from the work I had done with young families for 15 years and venture into the unknown future , he reminded me of this poem.  He said that as I was preparing to leave that particular world of work, other people were preparing to welcome me into another future world of work. And that is exactly what has happened.

This  is exactly how this trip is for me – as I leave one friend , one pair of loving arms, another friend is waiting, waiting with arms reaching out for a hug, arms to lean into and to feel held . Someone says ‘ she is gone’ as someone else says ‘ here she comes’ and I am once more welcomed with open arms and open hearts.

A ship sails and spreads her white sails to the morning breeze, and starts for the ocean, she is an object of beauty

and I stand watching her until she fades on the horizon.
Someone at my side says, “She is gone.”
Gone where?
Gone from my sight. That is all.
She is just as large as when I saw her.
The diminished size and total loss of sight is in me, not in her.
And just at that moment, when someone at your side says, “She is gone”
There are others who are watching her coming.
And other voices take up the glad shout.
“Here she comes!”

As I arrived in Winnipeg I was met with big smiles and hugs,  my journey across Canada continues .and as my host in Toronto observed ‘ My global heart is expanding’

As I write my morning pages I realise how my current writing and experiences bring up memories and experiences from my past and so there may be some upcoming posts which link back to times past. Such is life, a spiral which comes around again. onwards and upwards and ever expanding.

How my Canadian trip evolved and why I took a detour to Boston first.

Way back in early January , just 6 months ago, I had no idea or intention or insight that I  may be travelling to Canada this year.

Having said that, 3 years ago, during my first Visioning course with Hannah Marcotti, I cut out some pictures of the Canadian rail road from a travel magazine ~the images spoke to me of adventure, freedom, travel and wide open spaces. I have always had a desire to see what was just around the next corner.  There was the odd Mountie and cowboy throw in ~ ( time alone will tell if one should materialise.) I now believe that this was sowing the seeds of this trip.

 FullSizeRender (1)                                      FullSizeRender


I chose Epic as my guiding word for  the year, and though it gave me chills I had no idea how this year of 2015 was going to be Epic.

And then, on Jan 8th, I shared a vision page on facebook, which ,as often reflected my desire to spend more time near water, to go down to the sea. Suddenly, below this page, was a comment from my friend Tannis….



Spend summer at a Lake in Canada?? Moi ?? wow!!


And soon after that, Tannis wrote me ‘ if you are coming, and we hope you are, we’d like to take you on a  road trip across Canada, we have family in Kelowna and we are travelling to see them, and we would like to take you. Wow again! We will travel from Winnipeg to the Rockies and home again.

For several weeks I swithered, I hesitated, I was uncertain, I had doubts, my business was building up nicely – was it right to abandon it for the summer ?  Could I afford to? Could I, would I should I?

And then, I took Tisha Pletcher’s course Wanderlust, and it reignited my travel genes, my need to move and I knew in my heart that for this trip I would follow my heart and not my head. I said Yes.

Once I said Yes, numerous offers of accommodation and friendship came flooding in, as if by magic.

Kari in Vancouver asked me to stay with her, Jana is travelling from Texas to meet us, and that will be a gathering of friends with dancing in the kitchen, fun and laughter, conversations, a trip to Whistler and as yet unknown delights.

I contacted Bev, in Sasketchewan , my peer coach from my IIN health coach training, we spoke frequently and deeply for a year and never expected to meet in real life – I spoke of the road trip, we would be passing near by and could we have lunch – she asked me to stay for a week – I am going to help her declutter and she is going to feed me juices and fresh veg from her garden and we will do business review and planning IN REAL LIFE 🙂

I also hope to meet up with Shirley and Cheryl in Calgary, who I last saw in 1983 while travelling in Australia.  ( that would be a whole other post!)

I realised I could break my journey for a few days in Toronto, see the city and meet up with Sheila, Angie , Lisa , and that is happening this coming weekend. I can hardly wait.

Speaking to my good friend Liz , I shared how odd it would be to be flying West across the Atlantic and not be met by her at the airport as I had been the last couple of years of travelling to Boston following equally improbable trips to Kripalu, Cape Cod and a Lake retreat in Maine. Her  reply was ‘ We’ll come see you in Toronto and make it a family  holiday’ – I was so delighted that plans were coming together in a most wonderful way.

And then, Liz’s husband Eliot became unwell and was finally diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia. Their family life changed overnight  – from planning a family holiday to dealing with a hospital visits, chemo, medications and worrying ahead about the future, and getting through each day. ( Liz is going to be writing about all of this in her blog soon)

I sat with love and concern for Liz and her family, and with acute disappointment that I would not now see them and share the hugs and shoulder shaking laughter we enjoy.

Suddenly I knew that of course I could see them, by leaving early and taking a detour via Boston to their Littleton, MA home for a few days before travelling on to Toronto. And so, I changed my flight and took the now familiar journey here to what Liz calls my second home.

Spending time with Liz, offering reiki, head massage  sharing laughter and tears, visiting Eliot in hospital, chatting with Zach, sitting on her deck with coffee, enjoying her cooking and humour and admiring her resilience, this is what life is about, these precious shared moments.