I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance,
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom,
and that which came to me as blossom,
goes on as fruit.
― Dawna Markova,
‘ We are so often unaware that we are coping rather than living’ – John Hamwee , Touching the energy of bone.
This quote leapt off the page at me recently, while reading a text book about Zero Balancing. ZB uses touch and the energy of bone to rebalance a person’s energy and structure. The words enabled me to see that I had indeed been coping and not living – saying yes to any work that came my way , from a fear of financial lack , and not building in any down time to recharge my batteries.
I have found the therapy has been a wonderful reset for me and helped me to feel very still, calm and grounded. I took part in a 4 day introductory training earlier this year, partly to learn new skills and techniques to help others, and partly, as is so often the case, to enhance and build on my own personal self development. Amongst many insights I gained from it has been a greater awareness of my own needs and how I really need to take care of and invest in my own health and wellbeing as a continuous and intentional journey, and not simply dabble in it.
For this reason, so that I can move from simply ‘coping’ , to a life which has more pleasure and more joy and more beautiful moments which I am present to , I am taking some time over the next few weeks of summer , to :-
a) declutter and reorganise my home – not to live a minimalist lifestyle, I enjoy my home comforts and cosiness, but to ensure that everything in my home does indeed bring me joy, here and now, and is part of the me I want to move towards in the future. There is plenty of space for memories and keepsakes, I simply need to be sure I still want to keep things. It also involves moving items around the home to a different place – yesterday I moved a beautiful bright painting, from a place out of sight upstairs, to a place in the entrance hall and it is now the first place my eyes rest when I come home. I smile every time I see it. This is the energy I want in my home,not stuck and stagnant energy from times now past. I have items brought here from my childhood home 5 years ago,which I needed then – and now many I no longer need to have stored away in a box in the loft.
Following a recent art retreat in Italy , I now also want a dedicated space to paint.
b) I am also taking some time out to focus on the direction I want to take my business in, going forward from here – and to create a way to bring those services to the wider public eye.
I do know that focusing on work which brings me the greatest joy and is a pleasure to offer, is my way forward now. I intend to live my life fully and not just cope with it.
Mainly, I want to use the skills and talents I have learnt from investing in myself over recent years , to help and empower others to find the joy in their own lives and together practice techniques to help manage anxieties, overwhelm and stress.
This may start with telling the truth to yourself, understanding and owning your emotions, and really knowing that we can learn various techniques to manage our feelings.
I have a wish that we all feel as supported in our lives as I did in this thermal pool in Ischia recently.
May we all float calmly through our lives and ask for the support we need ,when we need it, knowing that support is always available to us.